How to change? When this self is turning so big… And your surround can’t seem to fit… How to stop? When you feel you have enough But your greed want more to grab… How to accept? When things that you dream of, Doesn’t look as good as it was… When all the …
Category Archives: Reflection
A conversation with myself
Hmm… Here it comes again… The dying sense… Fear… Of the upcoming suffering… It’s not here yet… Ah no… It’s here already… I don’t need the doctor to tell me my problem… I’ve been to it twice… And that genious told me i’ve totally recovered… But why does it keep coming??? Take a …
Back to nature
Can I stop this moment, please? I’m too excited to see what’s beyond this wonderful view… It’s a piece of green… Blue… A little white to blend them perfectly. Hmmm… What’s that at the curve? That’s the road we’re passing before… Now it turn to a small line… Haha… That’s cute… And…… Aha…. There’s a …
30 minutes
How long is actually 30 minutes? It was a 9 days retreat with 3 rules only. Less food, less sleep, less talk. So we can only deal with ourself. Keep mindful all the time. Then how long do you think is 30 minutes? I made my own schedule. At least 15 hours meditation a day, 30 minutes …
Hidupkah?
Hidup tapi mati Bernyawa namun tak berisi Bergerak tanpa makna Bernafas namun tak terasa Bahagia lalu sedih Tertawa lantas menangis Terjatuh atau berhasil Yang pasti, hidup akan mati… Lalu apa artinya hidup? Berjuang sepenuh hati namun tak berarti Lahir, tua, sakit lalu mati… Mengapa masih tak menempa diri?
Nafas
Dekat, namun tak tersentuh Nyata, namun tak terasa Ada, tapi tak terjamah Lembut, namun ulet Tenang, terus menemani walau teracuh… Kurasakan kehadiranmu dalam sekejap, lalu tak terasa lagi Kucoba lagi mengamati gerakanmu, tapi kau malah pergi Kucoba lagi mengejar, menangkapmu, tapi mengapa kau seakan menghilang? Hidup, namun tak bernafas… Bergerak namun tak pernah …
Just another thought
Sorry for this mind cant stop thinking. Long enough i left my meditation and this mind is uncontrolable. Can’t even control the action. Thinking to sit few times, but the ass won’t move. Whose fault? Always try my best to tolerate. To walk along with the mainstream. And keep the thinking inside. Try to be …
The time when I need god
I’ve forgotten who is god… Any god in general. Whether it’s with the capital “G” or with a “g” instead. From any religion. Any culture or country… I have not been bothering them for years… Since i convince myself that whatever happen to me is because of my ownself and whatever will happen next is …
Facing the dead zone
It’s funny that we never realize how important life is until we are close to the death. It’s funny also to see how we and our body react towards the death. Everything suddenly seems not right. Even when we have try to pretend it’s alright, the body just do not compromized. The body is also …
Lost
Sendiri di keramaian. Tidak. Aku tidak sendiri. Aku bersama para sahabat terbaik. Tetapi mengapa tidak mengobati kesendirian ini. Aku masuk lagi dalam keramaian. Ke dalam alunan musik yang sering kudengar. Dimana nada demi nada keluar ringan dari mulutku. Kupejamkan kedua mata, kunikmati merdunya suara indah sang vokalis. Tetapi mengapa sudut hati ini tak juga terisi. …